I’ve been meaning to bring this up:

Did it surprise anyone when we learned that George Michael was gay? Anyone at all? I seem to remember there being a certain amount of foofooraw when the news broke way back whenever it was.

I only ask because I remember seeing Wham!’s “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” video back in the 80’s and thinking, “Wow, that guy is so gay I can hardly believe it.” I don’t claim to have gaydar or anything, but, come on! With the teeth and the hair and the prancing about. What adverb is most closely related to the word “prancing”? “Gaily”! Exactly!

And his mirror-shades, carefully-shaped beard stubble, skin-tight blue jeans and cowboy boots look in “Faith”? It’s textbook “What a gay guy thinks a straight guy would dress like if that’s the sort of look he’s going for.” Not to mention all the shots of his ass.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as the saying goes. Whatever the man wants to do, as long as it isn’t in a public men’s room in a park, have fun and don’t tear anything. I’m just wondering if anyone was really fooled, and if so, how?

Also, I have a proposal that we take back the word “gay” so as to stop preteens from sniggering at Christmas carols. In return, we give them “fabulous.” It’s already mostly their word anyway. “How do these pants make me look?” “You look fabulous!” “At least they’re honest.” It’s fun to say, and each speaker can camp it up exactly as much or as little as he wants. And it'll make them feel good because the word currently has a positive meaning.